I don’t like my stepson…

I met my husband when his son was 6yrs old and now he’s 10yrs old, at the beginning of our relationship my stepson and I got along but now it’s withered down to nothing but a hello and goodbye and it’s so awkward because he lives with us full time and my husband and I have a little girl and a little boy together. This isn’t what I imagined my family being like.

When my husband and I first moved in together I noticed his son started strangling my little dogs, when I told my husband he just glazed over the whole situation and supposedly spoke with his son but I never trusted him alone with the dogs again. Then one day my goddaughter (our babysitter) called me and told me my big dog had nipped at my stepsons hand and was growling at him, my dog had never done anything like that he was such a love bug everyone loved that dog, but I started keeping him outside after that incident, my husband just told him to stop playing with the dogs and glazed over the topic again. Both of my goddaughters and my sister have all told me that they would rather not take care of my stepson unless absolutely necessary, at first I was so confused and upset about the whole thing but they later confessed that my stepson throws things on the floor and tells my goddaughters to pick it up because it’s their job, he hits them, and tells them that if they don’t play a game with him or take him to get fast food he will lie and say that my goddaughters neglect and refuse to feed him. My sister told me he pushed her twin girls (they’re the same age as my ss) and they got scrapes on their legs, she told my husband and he just laughed and said “haha kids”. Another time my ss was on a trampoline with my nephew and he jumped on my nephews back and hurt him so bad he had to go to the doctor and when my sister told my husband he again just laughed and said “okay I’ll talk to him”. But from then on my nieces and nephews did not want anything to do with him. My ss is always lying and I can’t stand it, he lies and tells my husband I don’t feed him that my mom (whom lives with us) doesn’t feed him and that we don’t talk to him, but when we ask him if he wants to eat he just says no and walks away, when I talk to him he gives me one word answers. And he ignores my mom when she speak to him or makes faces at her.

I’ve suggested counseling for him and all of us and my husband says yes but never follows through. He gets so defensive of his son and has repeatedly told me “my son will always come first over anyone in my life, always, no matter what”. I just want us all to get along and I feel horrible for not liking my stepson anymore I will never hurt him yell at him or belittle him but I just can’t stand him anymore, I could never say it out loud, and I know it’s obscene to feel this way because he’s only 10 yrs old. I just had to get it off my chest I’ve never told anyone how I feel.