Why do intense loves often not last

Based on my analysis, romantic relationships generally fall into two categories:

1.  Need-Based Love – This is the deepest, most intense kind of love, often leading to extreme attachment. When it ends, both people are emotionally wrecked. This happens when one person fills a deep emotional void for the other—like someone who lacked parental love and finds unconditional care in their partner, or someone struggling financially who gets spoiled with money and attention. But this kind of love often falls apart because of fundamental differences in values, personalities, and life goals.


2.  Choice-Based Love – This is when two people share similar interests, values, and long-term goals. There’s love, but it’s not as overwhelming as the first type. Instead, it’s stable, rational, and chosen with the future in mind. Even if someone once experienced the intensity of need-based love, they might choose this type for a long-term, peaceful relationship.

I’m probably the last person who should be talking about relationships since I failed at mine and I’m still hurting, but maybe thinking about it this way is helping me understand things better.

What do you guys think? Does this theory make sense?