I reviewed my matches. I was the reason I was losing.

After a lot of win streak & loss steak nonsense, I sat down and reviewed a match where my team got stomped. I went through every angle of that 12 minute match for a good 1 hour. I discovered that I was the fault.

(Context: The map was symbiotic surface, I was playing rocket in defense, Diamond 3)

As a healer, my positioning was trash. I was not covering for my other healer and not being mindful of our collective line of sights and different focus targets. I was not looking out for my punisher who was getting dove by black panther in that elevated platform at start point. I was not looking out for my dps who were just right behind me because my positioning was rubbish (constantly looking at the tanks) leading to me not having a better view of the entire play-field. I did not maintain line of sight of my teammates when they went in to secure an easy 3v1 collapse on the BP (instead, one of them died, and my dps got reverse collapsed on). I was not mindful of enemy respawn locations leading me to walk up with my team and get ulted by dr strange (despite knowing I gain nothing from being so huddled up with poor vision of all teammates). Despite knowing they have 3 flankers, I did not maintain vision of roundabouts leading to a complete tunnel vision on the payload and a enemy squirrel girl ult from the side when we were all huddled in a tight corner (team wipe).

Our attack phase was not much better. I switched to tank, went in at the wrong times to "make space" (useless when 2 of your teammates are still far away, walking upto point from their last death). I focused a cloak and dagger sitting inside her ult who was just ignoring me (captain america) instead of peeling for my dps who was clearly being targeted by enemy dr strange (it was literally 6v3 at 1 point where my whole team was alive and we got wiped shortly after). I did not pay attention to the black panther who was stalling 2 of our teammates instead of just collapsing onto him ( BP was so far away from his teammates). And I died a number of times just being impatient thinking I needed to make a "play" when my other tank was not even close to using ult yet.

That match I blamed my iron fist for never switching. Turned out he played well. Sure he was hyper-aggresive, but he did the right things. I didnt. I played a ranked match after this. Same map. It was night and day difference in terms of game awareness. I died less and healed way more. Mind blowing