Closeted Trans girl and Prom

I’m kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place

So I’m a senior in hs. I found out I was a trans girl a while ago, but I don’t feel comfortable transitioning in my current environment.

Prom is coming up. I didn’t go last year, and I want to go.

a bunch of girls are talking about their dresses, and it’s making me really envious. I wish i was born right so i could enjoy this like everyone else. so I could be happy wearing a dress, and not nervous scared.

If i do wear a dress (if i could even buy one) I’ll be really uncomfortable, because i’ve never presented femme in public ever.

I would regret not going, because i wouldn’t have that memory.

and i would regret going at all, because all of these girls, some friends, are going to be wearing these gorgeous outfits that i can only dream of.

i’m going to be heartbroken and defeated no matter what.

I just feel like there’s no good answer.

idk, thanks for listening