Marvel Rivals reminded me why i don't play multiplayer and why i really wish i did.

I have a soft spot for hero shooters since i have a lot of memories with TF2, but actually playing a team shooter that is a more "serious" that TF2 reminds me why i never really got into Overwatch, Apex and any other games of that kind. I'm a gifted kid burnout and never learned to deal with failure, much less when my failure makes another person pay for my mistakes, so every match just feels like being the last kid that gets picked out in phys ed because they never played basketball and gets shit on when they finally have the ball and don't know what do so they just freeze and make their team lose the match. There's so much pressure caused purely by my perception, in singleplayer games i only really have my own desire to keep playing as a motivator, but a projected fear of peer pressure doesn't make it very appealing. A lot of people say that i should just not care about what other players think, i don't think they understand that i don't really have control of that and am extremely averse to confrontation and my only reaction to someone being mad at me is shutting down essentially, i wanted to see if someone else in this sub feels something like this as well because i've never seen anyone have this issue and it makes me feel like a crazy person.