Did anyone else want HRT but struggle with the idea of looking/sounding too femme or too masc?

Hi friends! My appointment to start testosterone is coming up in a couple of months and naturally I’ve turned to Reddit for advice since I don’t really have a queer community to talk to about it IRL.

The whole question is really in the title. My identity fluctuates but I have dysphoria about my AGAB parts and my voice, and weirdly actually my hormones. I’ve always felt like I just had the wrong freaking hormones running through my body and the idea of having a T dominated system really excites me and just feels so right.

However, I don’t really know how I want to look/present just yet. Right now I have a pretty androgynous face and a short haircut, so from the neck up I kind of could pass as either binary gender and I’m cool with that! I worry that the hormones will send me fully into male territory and that doesn’t feel like me, just as much as fully female didn’t. Has anyone else experienced this doubt? What did you end up doing and how do you feel about it now??