I Need Help Switching Out Of A Conditioned Poverty Mindset Since Childhood

I’m at my Moms house and I asked to have ONE grape tomato, and she said to stop “eating everything” because she has no money. I only ate a can of tuna today until we had portioned dinner. I reached for a glass of water and got yelled at that we don’t “have any more gallons of water or money to get any”. I took a shower and she came running upstairs saying to cut the water off. If I open the refrigerator or reach for anything at all she gets upset and says everything is counted for. Do you know how small a grape tomato is? Then she was walking around the house saying x and y enjoy it know because we can’t afford it. This has been my entire life. The house is so cold I have to wear a fucking jacket to bed because the gas cost too much. There’s 3 people paying for the house rent. I’m just visiting and I brought my own food. The point is, EVERYTHING absolutely EVERY comment is followed by “we can’t afford it”. I can’t even wash my hair in the shower in peace because she’s like “I’m not paying for a plumber!” And now as an adult when I go to my own apartment I find myself fretting and counting food items and accepting a low quality of life because I don’t know what it’s like to spend to have a better form of life.

It’s so sickening and I feel it’s created a deep poverty mindset and idk how to transition.