Feeling defeated with budget / venues (NYC)

Is anyone else exhausted even before wedding planning has even really begun? Our current venue choice only has 2026 availability for 9/12/26 (meaning the rehearsal dinner would be 9/11). Given that we are getting married in NYC, this just won't do. Which means we are looking at a Spring 2027 wedding even though we got engaged in Spring 2024. For the record - we had another venue locked down prior to this but they fell through due to issues with the Event Director.

Our other venue choice right now is stunning and iconic but would be 40% of our HHI and double the cost of the venue we would have to wait until Spring 2027 for. They have availability for 2026 for the date we want. We're not in any rush to get married but a 3yr engagement just feels so long.

I've dreamt of my wedding my entire life and always envisioned it to be spectacular. I want to have a venue and date I am super excited about not just ehh. I'm finding myself having to compromise on so many things already (but maybe that's just life)? Part of me wants to go big or go home and really have everything I want on my wedding day, but the other part of me feels like it's insane to spend $350k on one day? For the record, we are paying for the wedding ourselves (i.e. no help from parents, all four of which immigrated to the US and do not have corporate jobs / salaries)."

EDIT: Thank you so much everyone for all of the advice <3 I especially appreciated hearing from the lifelong New Yorkers (since I myself am a transplant)!! We are visiting the higher cost venue tomorrow and then will decide between the two (since they are really different vibes)! But I'm glad that the first venue can still be very much in the running still. I just didn't want to have a massive faux pas by having the rehearsal dinner on that date.